Explore Chapter 14 of "生死场" with the original Chinese text, English translation, detailed Chinese vocabulary explanations, and audio of the Chinese original. Listen and improve your reading skills.
Her mother, sleeping beside her, was awakened by the lamplight, as if seeking comfort in the fate already decided, with infinite pity.
Not long after, the old woman woke up. She couldn't sleep again. When she saw her daughter not by her side but washing something in the middle of the room, she sat up and asked:
"Isn't this all because of those little Japanese soldiers? Those damned little Japanese soldiers! If we don't leave, aren't we waiting to die?"
Jinzhi had heard from the old folks that a woman traveling alone must disguise herself as old or ugly, tying a belt around her waist. She hung an oil can by her side, and a small bucket for rice also hung from her belt. She stuffed a small bundle containing needles, thread, and some scraps of cloth into the rice bucket. She pretended to be a beggar woman, smearing her face with dust until it was dirty and streaked.
"Take these with you. Put them in your bundle, don't let anyone rob you. I have no money at all. If you go hungry, sell them and buy some dry food to eat." As she walked out the door, she still heard her mother say: "If you meet Japanese soldiers, quickly hide under the wormwood."
Jinzhi walked far away, down the slope, but her mother's words still echoed in her ears: "Buy some dry food to eat." Her mind was filled with chaotic fantasies. She didn't know how far she had walked. She felt as if she were fleeing from home, walking briskly without looking back. The path was overgrown with short grass. Even the short grass hindered Jinzhi's hurrying feet.
Japanese soldiers rode in horse-drawn carriages, smoking cigarettes, speeding along the main road. Jinzhi trembled a little. She remembered her mother's words and quickly lay down in the wormwood by the side path. After the Japanese soldiers passed, her heart pounding, she stood up. She looked around in panic: where was her mother? Her hometown was far behind her. Ahead, she came to an unfamiliar village, making her feel as if she had passed through countless human realms.
The red sun was about to set beyond the horizon. Shadows stretched across the ground, thin and long like poles. After crossing a small river bridge, there wasn't much road left.
She felt such reluctance to leave her hometown's mountains. Her heart seemed to fly up in her chest. Jinzhi felt as if her heart had been plucked out and thrown somewhere unknown. She didn't want to go on. Forcing herself across the river bridge, she entered the path again. Ahead, Harbin city beckoned her. Behind, the mountains of home bid her farewell.
The path had no wormwood. If Japanese soldiers came, where could she hide? Perhaps in a crack in the ground? She looked around in all directions. Her heart was unsteady, her face sweating excessively. Finally, she was found by Japanese soldiers:
Jinzhi felt as if hit by a bullet, rolling down into a small ditch. The Japanese soldiers approached, looked at her dirty appearance. Like fat ducks, they made noises, swaying their bodies, and ignored her, walking past. They walked for a long, long time. She still didn't get up. Later, she cried. The wooden bucket was overturned there. The small bundle rolled out from the bucket. When she got up again, her shadow on the ground grew thinner and longer, like a fine thread.
In the night of Harbin city, Jinzhi slept on a drain cover in a small street. That street was for laborers and rickshaw pullers. There were small eateries, and the lowest-class prostitutes. The prostitutes' bright red pants often appeared at the doors of small earthen houses. Idle men, with peculiar postures, slowly joked with the women in red pants, then went into the small rooms, and came out after a while. But no one paid attention to the tattered Jinzhi. She was like a garbage bin, like a sick dog, huddled there.
The sky was full of stars, but they seemed distant. They were objects disconnected from Jinzhi. After midnight, a small dog came to Jinzhi's side. Perhaps the dog was also suffering? This stray dog slept inside the wooden bucket. When Jinzhi woke up, the sun still hadn't risen. The sky was filled with many stars.
Jinzhi's legs ached as if broken. She didn't dare stand up. Finally, she also squeezed into the crowd of beggars. After waiting a long time, the worker didn't come out with food. Sleeping outdoors in April gave her a bone-chilling shiver. When others looked at her, she felt ashamed of her appearance. She endured hunger and returned to her original spot.
The night street, what kind of human world was this? Jinzhi softly called for her mother, her body trembling uncontrollably on the drain cover. Despairing, crying, but like the small dog sleeping in the wooden bucket, she went unnoticed. It was as if they didn't exist in this human world. At dawn, she didn't feel hungry, just empty. Her mind was utterly blank. Under a street tree, she met a sewing woman and asked her:
The second time, Jinzhi succeeded. That woman led her away. They walked through disturbing streets, streets emitting foul odors. Jinzhi seemed to realize then: this wasn't the countryside. Here, it was all unfamiliar, alien, emotionless. Along the way, except for the chickens, fish, and smells in front of the eateries, she saw nothing else, heard nothing else.
After mending the socks, the feeling of emptiness in her stomach didn't end. If she could, she would steal something to eat from anywhere. For a long time, she stopped her needle, watching intently the child standing on the street eating biscuits. Until the child put the last piece of biscuit into his mouth, she was still watching.
Noon arrived. They walked alongside those ghost-like people emerging from the "opium den." The women's lodging had a particularly stifling atmosphere, making Jinzhi think this wasn't the countryside either. But those stagnant eyes, yellow faces-only after washing their faces with a water basin after eating did she notice. The whole room was over five zhang long, with no partitions. The walls were smeared with bedbug blood, long black and purple bloodstains dragging across them. Piles of filthy, fermenting bundles surrounded the walls. These diverse women, each seeming ill, rested their heads on the bundles and talked:
"The mistress of that household treated me well. We ate the same food, even if it was buns, I ate buns too."
Others followed her voice with envy. After a while, someone else said she had her mouth twisted by a servant in a mansion. She said she fell ill from anger, then continued with endless chatter. Jinzhi still couldn't understand these confusing words. She was pondering: what is a mansion? What is a mistress? After thinking hard, she asked a short-haired woman smoking beside her:
That woman didn't answer her, threw down the tobacco pipe, and went to vomit. She said she had eaten a fly with her meal. But on the long plank bed spanning the room, those city women laughed in a way that disgusted Jinzhi. They laughed rocking back and forth. Excited by laughing at this country woman, they slapped each other's shoulders, some even shedding tears from excessive laughter. Jinzhi sat quietly aside. When it was time to sleep at night, she said to the old woman she had just met:
"I think Harbin isn't as good as the countryside. Country sisters are very kind. See how they laughed at me at noon, clapping their hands!"
Jinzhi earned a lot of money. She sewed a small pocket inside her waistband, put two yuan in paper notes inside, then sewed the pocket shut. When the women's lodging collected fees from her, she said to that person:
Finally, that person didn't leave. Her hand was placed before Jinzhi's eyes. More and more women gathered, surrounding Jinzhi. It was as if she were performing a trick, attracting this many spectators. Among them was a fat woman in her thirties, completely bald, with a pink shiny scalp, standing out from the crowd. Her neck seemed fitted with trembling wires, making the shiny head turn and tremble lightly and freely. She said to Jinzhi:
She went to work on the street very late. At night, some bedbugs were crushed, emitting an offensive smell. Jinzhi sat up, scratching all over until she bled.
The urgent call gave a strange feeling. Jinzhi also understood she should walk fast, not look back. At night when lying down, she said to Aunt Zhou beside her:
The completely bald woman with the shiny scalp on the opposite long kang let out a sharp, cunning cry. She walked over to Jinzhi's head, as if to pull out Jinzhi's hair. Playing with her fat fingers:
Jinzhi stood outside the gauze window of a Russian pastry shop. Inside on the shelves were various oil-yellow pastries, sausages, pig legs, chickens-these foods shining greasily. Finally, she discovered a whole fat little pig, ears perked up, lying on a long plate. Around the pig were arranged some small cabbages and red peppers. She wanted to immediately hug the whole plate, take it home quickly to show Mother. She couldn't do that. She hated those little Japanese soldiers again. If not for the little Japanese soldiers disturbing the countryside, wouldn't her family's sow have given birth to piglets long ago? The "cloth bundle" gradually slipped from her elbow. Unconsciously, she stood restlessly in front of the shop. The sidewalk grew crowded. She bumped into pedestrians. A beautiful Russian woman came out of the pastry shop. Jinzhi quickly noticed her perforated shoes and the red-painted toenails underneath. The woman walked fast, faster than men, so Jinzhi couldn't look further.
"There's no work at all. I'm wearing this short shirt, with no change. I can't even save money to buy a few chi of cloth. Fees are due every ten days, that's one yuan five jiao. I'm old, my eyes are blurry, I sew slowly. No one ever takes me home to sew. I still owe a month's food money. I've been here for years! If I were new, I'd definitely be driven out." Walking along a cross street, she added: "A new woman, Zhang Po, she was sick and still driven out."
For money, for survival, Jinzhi cautiously followed a bachelor to his room. As soon as she stepped inside, Jinzhi saw the bed and was afraid. She didn't sit on the bedside, but sat on a chair first to mend the quilt. The man began to speak slowly to her. Every word made her heart race. But nothing happened. Jinzhi thought the man sympathized with her. Then she sewed the cuff of a lined jacket. The jacket was immediately taken off by the man. When the cuff was finished, the man took out one yuan from a small pocket at his waistband and gave it to her. As he handed over the money, he twisted his short-bearded mouth at Jinzhi and said:
Jinzhi was a country woman. She couldn't yet see the man's false sympathy. She was lightly moved by the word "pity." Her heart stirred a bit. Stopping at the door, she wanted to say a word of thanks, but didn't know what to say. Finally, she left. She heard the whistle of a large kettle by the roadside in her ears. The cart for picking up bread in front of the bakery stopped by the road. A Russian old woman with a flowery headscarf sped past her.
That man, his neck flushed, chased after her. When she returned to the room, there was nothing to do. The man, like an ape, bared his hairy chest, went to bolt the door with thick hands. Then he began to undo his pants. Finally, he called Jinzhi:
"Come quickly... little treasure." He looked at Jinzhi frozen, not moving. "I called you to mend pants, what are you afraid of?"
After dinner at the women's lodging, Jinzhi walked as if treading on waves of tears. Her head was excessively dizzy. Her heart felt as if it had fallen into a sewage ditch. Her leg bones softened, relaxed. She climbed onto the kang to get her old shoes and a towel. She wanted to return to the countryside, immediately lie on Mother and cry.
At the end of the kang, a sick woman was driven out by the owner when dying. They stopped discussing that matter. Jinzhi drew all their interest.
Aunt Zhou must have known Jinzhi earned money, because every new woman's first time "earning money" was overly shameful and hateful. Shame and hate destroyed her, as if suddenly contracting an infectious disease.
"You should wash your clothes and tidy up. You must leave early tomorrow morning. In the village, there's no chance to make a living."
A window suddenly opened. A black-faced man with a gun jumped in, stepping on Jinzhi's left leg. The black man looked up at the ceiling, then familiarly climbed up. Wang Po followed too. She hadn't seen Jinzhi for days and didn't say a word, as if she saw nothing. She climbed up to the ceiling. Jinzhi and her mother didn't know what was happening, just climbed up. Until dusk, no bad news came. They crawled down from the ceiling like insects. Wang Po said: "Harbin must be better than the countryside. When you go again, stay there, don't come back. In the village, Japanese soldiers are getting worse. They catch pregnant women, cut open their bellies to break the 'Red Spear Society' (a kind of volunteer army), living babies flowing out from the bellies. For this, Li Qingshan cut off two Japanese soldiers' heads and hung them on a tree."