Explore Chapter 5 of '老张的哲学' with the original Chinese text, English translation, detailed Chinese vocabulary explanations, and audio of the Chinese original. Listen and improve your reading skills.
"Lao Zhang, you're hungry!" he said to himself. "The stomach is like a street beggar-forever blustering and putting on a pitiful act. If you ate every time it rumbled, it might go off seventy or eighty times a day." He pressed his belly. "Nuisance! Don't you try to intimidate me. Lao Zhang has Lao Zhang's methods!" With that command, he felt his spirit immediately triumph over his flesh and began to plot everything.
"Today, those two calls of 'Attention!' were so crisp! How smoothly you pronounced all those foreign place names! Lao Zhang, you've got talent after all!..." "One hundred and forty, plus the thirty for the festival bonus, makes one hundred seventy. Xiao San's father is sure to send over a few pecks of grain, enough to eat for a month or two. Judging by today's look of him, the Education Inspector was satisfied. Once reported, that's another thirty in bonus. One hundred seventy plus thirty is two hundred-exactly two hundred! The shop definitely won't earn less than last year, though the accounts aren't settled yet!..." "The debt Li Ying's uncle owes is hopeless. Dismiss Li Ying and have him enlisted as a patrolman. Dock his pay on the spot, two silver dollars from his monthly wages-that's another twenty-four a year. After Li Ying leaves, Wang De can help with the accounts. Take two strings of cash less from him per month, but that saves the cost of hiring a young apprentice. Be ruthless! Forgo the two strings of cash!..."
The more he thought, the happier he grew; the happier he grew, the louder his stomach rumbled, yet the less he felt the need to eat! So he ran to the north room, picked up the Education Inspector's calling card, and studied it closely. The card was printed on red paper with gold characters on both sides. There were too many words, so Lao Zhang didn't recognize a few. He didn't mind that. After all, who but the Sage of Writing himself could know every word in the dictionary?
Graduated from the Educational Lecture Institute after four months of study. Observed education in Changping County. Recipient of a Third-Class Silver Medal from the British-American Tobacco Company. Former trainee in the artillery battalion of the 21st Regiment, 11th Division. Member of the Beijing Self-Governance Research Society. Member of the Beijing Young Men's Christian Association. Acting Educational Inspector for the Northern Suburbs of the Capital. Correspondent for Shanghai's *Leisure Evening News*. Nan Feisheng, with an English annotation: Nan Fi Sheng.
Style name Yunqing, alias Ruoting, contributing under the pen name Yiyu Shanren. For use of telephone, call East Exchange 1015. For visits only.
"This fellow has some pedigree!" Lao Zhang thought. "Just printing this card must cost over a dollar! Lao Zhang, you must venture into political circles too! Money without influence is like a cow with three legs-how can it stand firm!..." "Hmph! But men of pedigree are hard to deal with. Don't be fooled by his grinning face and sweet talk. He might be full of tricks! The textbooks are wrong, the lectern is the 'White Tiger Platform,' an inauspicious lectern, there's no spittoon in the yard... If I report it all truthfully, Lao Zhang, you might not be able to bear the consequences!"
"It's reported! The 'White Tiger Platform,' the old textbooks-the thirty-dollar bonus is gone! An official dispatch arrives: 'All practices herein are in violation of established statutes. Said institution is hereby ordered to cease operations immediately!' The students all leave. One hundred forty plus the thirty festival bonus-one hundred seventy gone!..."
"You have a brother? You're threatening me? Fine! The Education Inspector bullies me, and now you dare too! Get out! I won't keep feeding a dead sow who eats and drinks at my expense!"
Lao Zhang rushed out and delivered a sharp kick to the leg of the so-called dead sow. The woman crumpled like a blade of grass. Her eyes rolled back, two bean-sized tears welling in their corners, and she lost consciousness.
By now, the students had finished lunch and were trickling back. Seeing their teacher's wife sprawled on the ground and the teacher kicking her with alternate legs, they all stared wide-eyed, not daring to intervene, as if watching a father beat a mother or a brother beat a sister-in-law. Wang De entered, followed by Li Ying. (They hadn't gone home for lunch but had bought a few baked cakes, eating and discussing their affairs outside the school.) Wang De saw at once it was the teacher's wife on the ground. His smile vanished instantly, and he stepped forward to help her up.
Wang De truly wanted to declare war on Lao Zhang, but he lived by laughter and knew little of fighting. His whole body trembled. He couldn't lift his hands. His legs wobbled uncontrollably inside his trousers, making the pants seem baggier than ever. He couldn't even speak; his tongue pushed against a mouthful of saliva, retreating inch by inch.
Just as Wang De was at his wits' end, a sharp slap rang out, as if a red maple leaf had fallen from the sky, imprinting five and a half purple streaks on Lao Zhang's usually upturned left cheek. Li Ying! It was Li Ying!
Wang De began to understand: using your fists to pummel another person's body, without picking a spot-that was fighting. So he mustered all his strength and yelled, "Fight!"
Lao Zhang, caught off guard by the stinging slap, drew on years of experience and innate defensive instinct, unleashing all his martial prowess to grapple with Li Ying.
Hearing this, Lao Zhang actually laughed. Sun Ba didn't understand Wang De's meaning and only saw him charging forward with his whole body.
"Fighting in relays isn't fair either! All of you, such a commotion!" Sun Ba pushed and pulled Wang De back. Then he turned to Lao Zhang. "Mr. Zhang, please go inside. Don't be angry. The children don't know any better." Then he addressed the onlookers. "Gentlemen, much obliged! A teacher disciplining his students is nothing new. Please disperse!"
"Dismantling a house isn't half as exciting as burning it down, Li Ying!" Wang De chimed in. He had regained his life of laughter. First, because the teacher's wife had revived and wasn't really dead. Second, because Li Ying hadn't been hurt by Lao Zhang. Third, because today's fight was far more interesting than the usual student beatings.
"All of you, what a ruckus! Can't you say one word less?" Sun Ba mediated clumsily. "Sister-in-law, go stay at your parents' home for a day or two. Wang De, you escort your teacher's wife! Li Ying, go home for now! The rest of you, go inside and do your writing!" Sun Ba herded the remaining students into the classroom.